If you’re not familiar with ebooks, they have several advantages over regular hard-copy books, including the fact that you get instant access to download and save them on your computer right away. You can then read the ebook on your screen and/or print it out.

What’s this have to do with books to save a marriage? Well, a side benefit of this is privacy. Unlike regular books, ebooks aren’t lying around in plain sight – people don’t always want a husband or wife to know they have a plan to save their marriage.

If this applies to you, there’s a good chance that communication has reached an all-time low and/or that your spouse has been frustrated and angered by your efforts to save your marriage. And in this case, having a plan to save your marriage stored privately on your computer is probably a good idea!

If you and your spouse plan to work together to save your marriage together, this obviously isn’t a concern. However, do remember that the better save-a-marriage books, including our top picks, will help even if you are trying to save your marriage alone.

How Can Books to Save a Marriage Help?

Before introducing our top picks, here’s a quick run down of how books on saving a marriage can help – and how some are more helpful than than others.

Firstly, the better books give you all the advice you need and an actual step-by-step plan for fixing your marriage. This is an important feature to look for. Many marriage saving books do give plenty of good advice but don’t tell you how or when to apply it, and without a plan it’s less likely you’re going to see positive results, or any time soon.

Secondly, the best books on how to save a marriage obviously work well for couples but can also be followed by a husband or wife working alone to save their marriage. They recognize that this is often the reality of the situation – that communication is poor or one spouse has simply “burned out” on trying.

Some additional features we’ve looked for are a long-standing reputation. For instance, Amy Waterman’s Save My Marriage Today is a long-running best-seller, while Relationship Recovery is newer but part of a respected series of relationship “how to” books.

We’ve also checked for low refund rates, and that they are backed by easy “no-questions-asked” 100% money-back guarantees in case a plan isn’t right for you. A plan to save your marriage may be a great plan, but you may find that one “speaks your language” better than another. Rock solid guarantees make it possible to shop around for the plan most likely to work well for you.

Recommended Best Books for Saving a Marriage

Based on the criteria above, we highly recommend the following three books:

	“Save My Marriage Today“, by Amy Waterman – A complete course for saving a marriage, and long-term bestseller. Read our Save My Marriage review or visit the website
	“Relationship Recovery“, by Rachel Rider – Also a complete course, and a strong rival to Amy Waterman’s plan – you might like to check them both out and see which suits you better. Read our Relationship Recovery review or visit the website
	“1000 Questions for Couples“, by Michael Webb – Though not a “plan for saving your marriage”, this is an excellent resource for reconnecting with your spouse, and on a completely new level. Read our 100 Questions review or visit the website

If you feel that one of these plans can help you, try it 100% risk free. All recommended books here at DealWithDivorce.com are backed by easy “no-questions-asked” 60-day 100% money-back guarantees.

However, most people find that once they have actually made the right decision about whether or not to divorce, there are no bolts of lightning or clashes of thunder. Life has taken a step in new direction, and a new direction that may be challenging but feels right.

The big question is, how do you make the “right decision”? – how do you know if you should get a divorce, or not?

Before moving on to the answer it’s helpful to take a close look at the problem – why deciding to divorce is so difficult.

Why it’s so hard to know if you should divorce

It goes without saying that deciding whether to divorce or save your marriage is a life-changing decision – one of the most important you will make. This in itself makes it difficult and stressful.

What makes it harder yet is that unlike other big decisions, like moving house or changing jobs, there are few hard cold facts to work with, no easy apples-to-apples comparisons to make.

On top of this, there are lots of emotions in play that hamper decision-making abilities and leave us perpetually second-guessing ourselves. In fact there are two major bundles of emotions in play. There are:

• All the emotions caused by a “failing” marriage – the day-to-day frustrations, resentments, regrets, conflicts, and…
• All the emotions stirred up by thoughts of ending it – fears, concerns and uncertainties about the possible effects of divorce on children, of how a spouse will react or survive, on finances…

In the end, knowing if you should get a divorce or not involves much more than deciding whether or not to end a marriage – a relatively straightforward (though not easy) decision.

It is complicated by other concerns that leave people struggling to make the “right decision” all round. The fact is, this is extremely difficult if not impossible – there are so many variables in the mix that what seems like the best decision one day seems completely wrong the next.

So what is the best way to know if you should get a divorce?

Odd as it may seem, the best way to know if you should get a divorce or not is to forget about “divorce” altogether. That is, put aside your fears and concerns about divorce so that you can focus on the real issue, which is the state of your marriage.

The reason you need to do this is that the “right decision” for the future will be the one that best reflects the true state of your marriage. Once you know what this is, your options for the future will be based on reality, leading you to a decision that may be difficult but feels right.

The trouble with the “D” word is that it muddies the waters with all sorts of issues, fears and concerns that are actually unrelated to the state of your marriage. These unrelated issues lead people (and potentially you) to make decisions for the future that are out of sync with what matters most – the reality of their marriage, and how they really feel. And the end result is a great deal of unhappiness.

You are probably wondering, “How on earth can I put aside thoughts about divorce?”

Well, a few “home truths” about divorce may make it easier than you think.

The fact is, fears about divorce muddy the waters unnecessarily – they are either unfounded or entirely manageable, if and when you decide to divorce.

• For example, concerns about the effects of divorce on children are valid but have been unduly heightened by high-profile research now known to be fundamentally flawed. They also overshadow the effects of subjecting children to the fall-out of a failed or failing marriage. What’s more, research is by nature “general”. There are many ways to ensure that your children cope well, and a great deal of expert advice is easily available to help you with this.
• Similarly, fears about practical matters – finances, where you will live, and so forth – are natural but entirely manageable. Legislation, legal expertise and whole host of divorce-related agencies are in place to ensure certain outcomes. Family Courts have also introduced many new services and procedures designed to protect children and promote fair outcomes with minimum conflict.

With the “big bad boogeyman” of divorce seeming not quite so big and bad after all, it should hopefully be easier for you to put it aside and focus on the fundamental question – what is the true state of my marriage?

Once you unearth the answer, the question, How to know if I should get a divorce? may or may not be relevant. You may find that there is more hope for your marriage than you thought and, on analyzing how this makes you feel, decide that you would like to give saving your marriage your best shot. Alternatively, you may find that you have been deluding yourself, thinking that it could or should be saved and that painful and difficult as it may be, you now know you should get a divorce.

Either way, you will have a set of options based on the reality of your marriage. In short you will be in a position to do the right thing, and feel confident that it is the right thing.

This is how you will make sure that you do not end up in two, five or twenty years with regrets, wishing you had left a loveless marriage, tried harder to save it, or given your spouse – your marriage – that second chance.

For more help, see:

• 5 Essential Steps in Deciding Whether to Divorce
• Guidelines for Deciding Whether to Divorce or Not
• Self-help questions: Reasons to Get a Divorce and Reasons to Try to Save a Marriage, designed to help you assess your marriage.

This article on “How to Know if You Should Divorce” is original and exclusive to this site.

Ideally there would be some kind of quiz that automatically spewed out the “right answer” – just told you whether or not you should get a divorce. But even then, many people would still find themselves bouncing back and forth, not quite sure about whether or not to actually follow through and do what they need to do.

You’ll be pleased to know that the advice below does include links to something of a “should I divorce quiz” - reasons to divorce (or not) that will steer you in the right direction. Their purpose is to help you realistically assess your marriage as a critical “first things first” step.

Here is an overview of all the key steps in deciding whether you should divorce or not (with links to additional advice), to help you make the right decision and feel confident about taking action. Although they are numbered 1 to 5, they are best applied all at much the same time.

1. Get to Grips with the Reality of Your Marriage

As you can read in How to Know if You Should Get a Divorce, the better question is, what is the true state of my marriage? This is the better question because it is most likely to guide you to the right decision – a reality-based decision that you won’t regret. On the other hand, when people think in terms of “divorce”, they often make the wrong decision, influenced by what they feel about divorce rather than the real issue: whether or not there is any hope for their marriage.

For instance many people are so frightened and distracted by the “D word” (and for the most part, unnecessarily) that they stay in a marriage that’s best ended. Others are influenced by the punishment potential of divorce (and quite often, friends and family too) to end a marriage worth saving and, too late, wish they had given that second chance. Either way, they have set themselves up for long-term unhappiness.

So, the first step in deciding whether to divorce is to assess the real state of your marriage and what you really feel in your heart and soul about that reality. This can be difficult – we all have lives to lead – and chances are it’s not something that you’ve really be able to do. However, when you stop thinking in terms of “what to do” – and all the associated fears and worries – and focus on first coming to terms with the reality of your marriage, the right options will start to reveal themselves.

To help you assess your marriage, you can see our Guidelines for Deciding Whether to Divorce which introduces two sets of self-help questions – or quizzes:

• Should I Divorce? and
• Should I Try to Save My Marriage?

These work together – be sure to read both – to help you assess your marriage.

2. Be Prepared to Follow Through with What You Decide

Secondly, you need to be prepared – up front – to “honor” the outcome of this “divorce or not” decision process. There is no doubt that the outcome – be it divorce or trying to save a marriage – will be challenging, emotional, stressful but, as with many things in life, it’s the first step that’s the hardest. Be assured that when the decision made is the right decision, things will fall into place surprisingly easily, and will not be complicated by nagging doubts and regrets that throw you off track and/or come back to haunt you later.

So, if all indications are that you should try to save your marriage, then that’s what you need to do. You will end up thank your lucky stars that you did, or – if divorce proves unavoidable – feel reassured by the fact that at least you really did try.

Similarly, if all indications are that you should get a divorce, then that’s what you need to do. There is every chance that if you don’t, you will be asking the question over and over again – should I get a divorce? – and in the meantime living a life that could be happier for you, your spouse and children.

3. Be Prepared for Self-Doubt About Your Decision

In order to commit to your decision and take action, you need to be prepared in advance for the “grass is greener” effect.

• Once you have decided whether to divorce or not, it is virtually 100% guaranteed that you will second guess yourself, even though you know the decision you have made is sound, based on the true state of your marriage.
• To make matters worse, it’s also highly likely that you will find yourself under pressure from your spouse, as well as friends and family, to change your mind.

When this happens, you will need to remind yourself that the decision you have made is the right decision. Recognize that it is natural for self-doubt and other emotions to kick in at this stage, but not wise to act on them.

4. Get Non-Biased Advice and Support

If you are lucky enough to have a good support system in place – valued friends, family and colleagues – take advantage of this but limit their influence while you are deciding whether to divorce or not, and once you have made a decision. Their thoughts and opinions may be well-intentioned but the ultimate reality is that they don’t have to live with your decision – you do.

Encourage those who love and care for you to support you in non-opinionated ways, for example as sympathetic listeners or  pleasant distractions from the day-to-stress of your troubled marriage.

At the same time, get independent support systems in place – the most reliable way to get access to realistic and impartial support and advice. For instance, there are many online forums where anonymity allows you to be thoroughly honest and open, as well as many excellent free self-help divorce clinics and relationship services.

5. Get Educated

Once you have made a decision about whether you should divorce or try to save your marriage, take steps to educate yourself as soon as possible. There is no need to actually take action – the idea is to investigate what will be involved and what help is available, to bolster your confidence on your chosen path.

For instance, there are many books on how to save a marriage, including step-by-step plans that work even if your spouse isn’t interested in trying. There are also some great books available to guide you through the process of divorce.

Tools like these will help you see that your decision is achievable, and quickly eliminate a great number of concerns and fears.

There’s no doubt it would but a creating a truly comprehensive and reliable quiz is very difficult, as everyone’s marital circumstances vary. It’s impossible to ask all the questions that would need to be asked to guarantee everyone a cut-and-dry, sure-fire, 100% dependable answer. Then too, people themselves are different, and can be more or less honest or realistic in responding, making the answers they would get not so reliable after all.

However, one way or another, you do need to get an honest and realistic assessment of your marriage as a basis for moving forward.

As you can read in How to Know if You Should Get a Divorce, the right decision for the future – whether to get a divorce or save your marriage – will be the decision that reflects your true feelings about the true state of your marriage.

With this in mind, I have put together a “Should I Divorce or Save My Marriage?” quiz of sorts. Rather than a check box-type quiz, it is made up of statements that may be true or false. In essence, these statements are the main reasons for divorce as well as key factors in saving a marriage.

As mentioned earlier, it’s not possible to cater to everyone’s marriage but they will help you make a realistic assessment of whether or not your marriage is over. The reasons to consider are split into two parts:

• Should I Get a Divorce? – Good Reasons to Divorce and…
• Should I Save My Marriage? – Reasons not to divorce

Before you get started:

To make the most of these questions, put aside all other thoughts and concerns and focus on your marriage, period.

For instance, any fears you might have about the process or consequences of divorce, of what friends and family might say, of how you and your children will survive, and so on.

There are some questions that address these issues directly. Otherwise, do your best to out them aside – these “outside issues” can distract people from being honest about the state of their marriage, and are entirely manageable if and when they need to be.

Together, they are designed to help you make a realistic assessment of the state of your marriage – the most reliable basis for making the right decision for the future.

This may seem obvious but as you can read in How to Know if You Should Get a Divorce 101, the “D” word tends to raise all sorts of concerns that take the focus off the most important issue – whether or not a marriage is over.

The following reasons to divorce are are arranged into three groups, with “yes” answers indicating that you should most likely, definitely or immediately get a divorce.

Should I Get a Divorce? – the answer is most likely “Yes” if:

Your marriage has almost always been difficult, plagued by continual problems far outweighing any positive gains. In other words, the bad days have always far outweighed the good days and overall, your marriage has had a consistently negative impact on your emotional well-being.

The majority of problems have been caused by fundamental behavioral and personality traits that you have good reason to believe (perhaps through past efforts at change) are ingrained and extremely unlikely to change. These may be personality and behavioral traits of your spouse and/or traits of your own.

Certain beliefs, values, activities and interests are perpetually at odds. This refers to entrenched interests and beliefs such as certain religious affiliations, distasteful sexual preferences and extreme political or personal beliefs that reflect deep-seated differences in values that impact your ability to both love and respect your spouse.

You have made several serious efforts, jointly or separately, to save your marriage with no success. There is a point at which it is wise to accept that the marriage is over. Your efforts have not been pointless – the fact that you have tried will help you accept and adjust to divorce.

Your spouse has taken steps that indicate a firm decision on their part not to continue to try to save the marriage. For instance, they have intimated that they themselves are considering divorce or separation, have already left the marital home, or have deliberately escalated behaviors known to cause conflict.

You yourself are no longer prepared to try to save your marriage. In considering this point, give yourself time to answer honestly. Do not allow yourself to think in terms of “success”, “failure”, “giving up” – connect with what you really feel. If you no longer have the emotional resources or interest to save your marriage, it is wise to accept reality and the fact that you should get a divorce.

You have a track record of unhealthy relationships. If the answer is “yes” and you find that one or more of the points on this “Should I Divorce?” page apply, there is a good chance that your marriage is clearly over but you have difficulty realizing or accepting this. In this case, not only should you get a divorce, but you should seek help to remedy your high tolerance for unhealthy relationships. (In evaluating past relationships, include your experience of your parents’ relationship – if troubled, it may have contributed to your acceptance of unhappy relationships.)

You are afraid that your troubled marriage is harming your children. You may be right. Much attention has been given to the “effects of divorce on children” and relatively little to the “effects of a bad marriage”. However, just as it isn’t always a good idea to stay together for the sake of the children, it’s not necessarily a good idea to divorce for the children either. Nonetheless, the negative impact on your children has to end one way or another. This means you need to decide as soon as possible if you can save your marriage and if not, you should certainly divorce – it makes no sense to stay in a marriage that is over and harm your children in the process. (If you are already certain your marriage is over, read on.)

Should I Get a Divorce? – the answer is definitely “Yes” if:

You are certain your marriage is over but afraid of how divorce will affect your children. As mentioned above, the effects of divorce on children more attention than the effects of a bad marriage. What’s more, much of the “bad press” about the effects of divorce has been based on flawed research. Today, experts agree that it is “bad parenting” rather than “divorce” that is at fault. With good parenting during divorce children cope remarkably well. In short, you should not be deterred by what are essentially unnecessary fears, particularly as your trouble marriage may be causing real harm. Get a divorce and take advantage of the countless free resources available to help parents ensure their children cope well with divorce.

You are certain you should get a divorce but afraid of  “divorce”. For instance, you are afraid of how you will cope on your own emotionally and financially, of what your friends and family will think, of how your spouse will react, of unforeseen consequences and the whole mysterious process of getting divorced. In this case you should go ahead and get a divorce, no question. While your fears are natural you will find that each issue is manageable – there are many ways to ensure certain outcomes in all areas of concern. Remember, most people find that once they have made a firm decision to (or filed for) divorce, reality is far less difficult and intimidating than they had imagined.

Your spouse has addiction issues that you have good reason to believe will continue or resurface. For example, there have been numerous attempts at recovery, repeated pretenses of recovery, or a complete unwillingness to contemplate treatment. In answering this question, be entirely honest. Put aside thoughts of how your spouse will survive without you – this is not relevant.

The answer is definitely “Yes” – and the sooner the better – if:

Your spouse is abusive to you and/or your children. While it may seem like it, abusive behavior is never prompted by other people, circumstances or events. It is prompted solely by an abusive personality which will find any “justification” necessary for expressing itself. This is why it is inexcusable and why the only realistic solution for ending abuse is to leave the abuser. In other words, there is no question that you should get a divorce.

Your spouse has been unfaithful more than once. For many spouses that have cheated it is a once-in-a-lifetime mistake that they deeply regret, because of all that they nearly lost, and never repeat. However, we are all familiar with the term “serial cheat” and the term applies the instant a spouse reoffends. As with abusers, there is a level of self-justification – indeed, a sense of “entitlement” – at work that is deeply entrenched and beyond remedy. Make no mistake – if you continue in a marriage with a serial cheat further heartbreak is 100% guaranteed.

What to Do Next

If you’ve answered “yes” to only a few questions in the first section and none in the following two, it’s likely there are good reasons you should try to save your marriage.

If all indications are that “yes” your marriage is over, divorce is of course not your only option – you may prefer to get a separation.

I would recommend too (if it’s safe to do so) that you allow yourself some time before taking any action. You can use this time to adjust to and accept the sad realization that divorce does seem to be the right decision – it will be important to be firm about your decision when you tell your spouse. You might also find it helpful to read through a divorce guide which will help you see that divorce is a manageable process, and feel more confident about how you will cope.

“Should I Get a Divorce” by Caroline Mackenzie is an original article exclusive to this site and protected by copyright.

Together, they are designed to help you make a realistic assessment of the state of your marriage as the basis for making the right decision for the future.

As you can read in How to Know if You Should Divorce 101, the question of whether or not a marriage can be saved is often complicated by other concerns, making it difficult to reach any decision about divorce, let alone the right one.

So, try to put aside other concerns and negative feelings you may have about your husband or wife and answer yes or no to each statement as honestly as you can. Many couples have survived their problems but the first step is to decide if this is possible.

Should You Try to Save Your Marriage? – the answer is “yes” if :

You still have strong feelings for your spouse.

Your marriage has generally been happy and fulfilling. In sum total, you have had more happy days than otherwise.

Difficulties in your marriage have been caused by external factors. For example, the main causes of conflict and unhappiness have been related to events, circumstances and other people rather than fundamental incompatibility between you and your spouse. These may include the loss of a job, unforeseen or unmanageable financial issues, changes in family circumstances such as a new child or responsibilities for an elderly relative, illness, unwelcome interference by in-laws, and so on.

Difficulties in your marriage are relatively recent, and can be traced to a specific event and/or state of mind. For example, one or both of you may have been experiencing a great deal of stress caused (or worsened) by an event that brought things unexpectedly to crisis point. When this happens, there is a tendency for many built-up frustrations to emerge “out of the blue”, leaving the other spouse understandably confused, hurt and resentful.

One of you has done something to cause difficulties in your marriage that can be solved or forgiven. Sometimes it is difficult to imagine that you can forgive or see your way to a solution but if it is possible that you can, then difficulties do not necessarily need to end in divorce.

You or your spouse has cheated – once. Infidelity is a common cause of divorce but perhaps not so common as you might imagine. Many couples have not only managed to survive the pain and bitterness of infidelity, but found that their marriage has become stronger than before.

This happens when a spouse has made a genuine mistake. The shock of nearly losing everything they hold most dear remains with them together with an enormous sense of love, appreciation and respect for a spouse who, against all odds, gave them a second chance. However, there can often be a great deal of pressure from friends and family not to give that chance. If your spouse has cheated, it is essential to give yourself time and to remain focused on your marriage and what feels right to you. 

(Note: The above does not apply if your spouse has cheated for the second (or more) time – skip straight to Good Reasons to Divorce.)

Your spouse has indicated that they are concerned and would like to take action to save your marriage. While it is possible to take steps to try to save a marriage alone, it is of course easier when you are both trying.

However, it has to be said that the whole process of trying to save a marriage is easier when a husband or wife is as keen as you are to avoid divorce. In this case you have more options, and one that is well worth considering is 1000 Questions for Couples by Michael Webb.

Michael Webb is a well-known relationship “guru” with several books under his belt, not to mention numerous TV appearances. But looking beyond the personality, his advice has substance and is always practical with a good grasp on reality.

How can 1000 Questions help save a marriage?

Stopping a divorce involves many things and 1000 Questions for Couples deals with one of them head on – “rediscovering” each other. As counsellors know very well, this can not only save a marriage but make it better than it was before. After all, you not only gain a new awareness of each other but a new understanding – plus the experience of having been through and survived a difficult time, together.

What 1000 Questions for Couples does is give you the right questions to ask to discover (or rediscover) who you both really are, questions which in many ways explain why you are the person you are.

As I said above, Michael Webb provides substance not fluff and the same applies here. Questions are not gimmicky, party-style questions that most of us have asked or been asked at some point. They are solid often challenging questions that most of us have never been asked before, not even by our husband or wife – and perhaps not even by ourselves.

This is what makes 1000 Questions one of my favourite Michael Webb books – it’s a straightforward vehicle for a fascinating process of discovery leading to more than a few “aha!” moments as well as insights likely to support your marriage in the future.

Perhaps the simplest way to explain it’s value is that 1000 Questions for Couples has value not just for people looking to save a marriage, but as marriage-building questions for more happily married couples and people who really aren’t sure if they should marry their partner. So, if you visit Michael’s page, bear this in mind – it addresses a variety of situations. As Michael Webb explains:

“An estimated 83% of divorces would not take place if couples asked each other the right questions… While these questions are an absolute must for couples to ask while dating, over 700 of the questions are crucial for married couples to discuss too.”

Simple, positive, low-pressure approach to reconnecting

Finally from me, an important and often overlooked benefit is how 1000 Questions brings you together in a constructive and positive way that (unlike appointments with counselors and so forth) is also casual and relatively pressure-free. This is important. Often, when a marriage is in trouble, one spouse gives up trying because trying is too troublesome.

The idea is that you work through the questions one at a time, always working on the same question at the same time. You then email your answers to each other, or read them out to each other in some quiet time set aside for this. If you like, you can take advantage of a free optional service to have the questions emailed to you both, one at a time.

There’s a lot of potential in this approach for developing a sense of togetherness and perhaps laughter too in the shared anticipation of “what’s next?” and what your answers are going to be – two things that have most likely been sorely lacking in a troubled marriage.

For more details, you can visit Michael Webb’s 1000 Questions for Couples, here.

At $27 it’s one of the more affordable as well as worthwhile tools to help you save your marriage, and includes a no-questions 60-day 100% money-back guarantee too.

Amy Waterman’s “Save My Marriage Today” aims to address all the possibilities and provide a solution to both save and improve a marriage. So, whatever “saving a  marriage” means to you, it’s likely Amy’s complete plan can help you do just that – and sooner rather than later.

As the “Today” implies, Amy Waterman is sympathetic to the fact that most people want to see actual results sooner rather than later.

One immediate benefit of Save My Marriage Today is the positive feeling of having an actual plan of action to follow – a way forward.

When a marriage is in trouble the difficulty of knowing exactly how to save it leaves people feeling trapped between the proverbial” rock and a hard place” – having to accept the way things are, or divorce.

This sense of entrapment often stems from being the only one in the marriage willing to try to revive or repair it. Again, Amy Waterman’s plan can help.

Save My Marriage Today works solo

The Save My Marriage Today system doesn’t rely on the interest or involvement of your spouse. It’s designed to be effective even if you are the only one working to save your marriage.

This removes a huge burden for any of you who’ve found that your husband or wife isn’t willing to try, or to try anymore, There’s no need to nag, cajole or otherwise persuade them to “play along” which can often cause a spouse to close off even more.

Save My Marriage is a very extensive “course” and a downloadable course too – simply download and save it on your computer. This means that if you feel it’s better that your husband or wife doesn’t know you’ve got a plan, because they’re not interested in or dead-set against helping to save your marriage, they don’t need to know. (You can print it out if you like, otherwise read it on your computer.)

How Can Save My Marriage Today help your marriage?

I use the word “course” because Save My Marriage Today does give you an actual plan of action. This is important – many “marriage rescue” books don’t. In addition to an awful lot of critical insights, guidance and advice, you get what Amy calls a “nitty-gritty” step-by-step strategy for saving your marriage. And it’s not complicated – we found it simple and easy-to-follow.

As I mentioned at the beginning, Amy’s plan is designed to overcome all sorts of marital problems from ones that are slowly killing it to crisis situations. Some examples she gives are:

• An inability to communicate properly with your spouse
• Lack of physical intimacy
• Infidelity
• Continual fighting
• Controlling or suffocating behaviours
• Issues with children
• Trial separations

… and many more complex and difficult situations.

What’s included?

Usually in a review, I like to give some examples of “what you’ll learn” but when Amy says Save My Marriage Today is “comprehensive”, she’s not exaggerating. This makes it difficult to do it justice with just a handful of examples but you’ll find plenty on Amy’s Save My Marriage page.

As well as “Save My Marriage Today”, Amy’s bundled the plan together with six bonuses:

• A personal email consultation with Amy Waterman and her team, for frank expert advice on your specific situation, and
• “How to Cheat-Proof Your Relationship” which provides insights as well as practical guidance on surviving as well as preventing infidelity.

The four remaining bonuses complement the Marriage plan by helping you develop yourself, too. These are:

• Stress: The Silent Killer – A Comprehensive Guide To Wellness and Inner Peace
• Seven Ways to Live Life to the Max
• How to be Happy!
• The Journey – How to Gain the Life of Your Dreams

Again, you’ll find full details of these extras and how they tie in with Save My Marriage Today at Amy’s website. All the components of Amy’s Save My Marriage course are supplied in ebook (.pdf) format, available to download right away.

“Save My Marriage Today” is $49.95 and backed by a 60-day “no questions asked ” 100% money-back guarantee, for a totally risk-free purchase.

This is an original Review of Amy Waterman’s Save My Marriage Today by Caroline Mackenzie, exclusive to this site and protected by copyright.

Sometimes divorce is inevitable – quite clearly the right decision – but often it’s not. The question remains, can I fix my broken marriage?

It’s a question that needs answering because if the answer is “no”, knowing that you gave it your best shot will help you accept divorce. And of course if the answer proves to be “yes” and you do manage to save your marriage, you’ll thank your lucky stars you tried.

But how can you tell if it is possible to fix your marriage, and if so, what does it take? What if your spouse simply isn’t interested? Should you still try to fix your relationship?

Relationship Recovery is a complete course designed to answer all these questions and most importantly, give you an actual strategy that can work even if you’re the only one trying to save your marriage. It gives you a step-by-step approach to significantly boost your chances of not only fixing your marriage but improving it.

A fresh, optimistic but realistic approach to fixing a relationship

One of the first things that strikes you about the Relationship Recovery course is that it’s realistically positive.

For instance, it operates on the assumption that with the right know-how, most failing relationships can be saved, and that the success or failure of a marriage often pivots on the smallest of things. In other words, the smallest change can make a remarkable difference. It’s quite possible, then, that you could see results sooner and much larger than you expected.

While encouraging, these are good solid realities – common knowledge among relationship experts. It’s also a reality that a relationship can be saved even with only one partner trying.

Can Relationship Recovery help everyone fix their marriage?

Marriages and serious relationships fails for more reasons than can be listed but as experts know, those reasons are underpinned by certain fundamentals, allowing the same solutions to repair just about any relationship.

This is why Relationship Recovery is designed to work whatever the apparent problems in a marriage – from failures in communication or intimacy through to the “big issues” issues like infidelity or addiction.

How the course works

Most people anxious to save their marriage have soaked up a great deal of advice from the internet, friends, magazines and books. The difficulty (as you may have found) is that much of it is conflicting, hard to take seriously or plain wrong, although you may not know it.

Relationship Recovery addresses this by asking you – before you begin the course – to forget everything you think you’ve learned about how to save a marriage and start afresh with a clear and open mind.

This makes sense. The internet is a great source of information but a great deal of online “advice” is out of date, supplied by “amateur experts”, and likely to further damage rather than fix your relationship.

That done, the course gives you the specific insights, skills and tactics you need to repair your relationship.

More details are available at the Relationship Recovery site but some examples of what you’ll learn are:

• Exactly what went wrong with your marriage.
• The most important thing you need to do, immediately.
• The top relationship-busting mistake – something you may have done without knowing it – and how to easily fix it.
• The most common and harmful misconceptions that most people have about their relationship.
• Specific, step-by-step techniques to get your spouse to fall in love with you again.
• How to identify and handle danger spots that have been causing your relationship to fail.
• The most toxic behaviors in relationships and how to avoid them.
• Communication techniques that will get your partner to listen and talk, and see the need for change.
• The vital “do’s and don’ts” for repairing a marriage damaged by infidelity by you or your spouse.
• How to overcome and resolve commitment issues.
• How to bring passion back no matter how long you have been together.

As I mentioned earlier, there’s no need to get your spouse involved for it to work. This will be great news if you’ve already tried – and failed – to work together with your spouse to save your marriage.

In fact, there’s no need for them to know that you’re trying. Because Relationship Recovery is an ebook course – they’re not going to find it lying around. You can just download it to the privacy of your computer.

Structured Step-by-Step Approach to Relationship Repair

Everything you learn about how to fix your marriage is knitted into an actual step-by-step action plan so you know exactly what to do and when, no guesswork required. This gives Relationship Recovery a considerable advantage over most “save your marriage” books, many of which provide lots of advice, yes, but leave you high and dry in terms of an actual plan to make use of it.

As well as the Course itself, Rachel’s included two bonus books.

The first is, “Is Your Relationship Worth Saving?” by Dr. Rob Bilton and Melody Chase. This is a sensible addition to the package – it’s as well to be absolutely sure that saving your marriage makes sense and this book will help you make a realistic assessment.

The second is, “Repair After Separation“. If you’ve already separated this bonus ebook shows you if it is possible, and how, to get back together again. (I should add here that although Relationship Recovery is designed to prevent separation, I feel that in many ways it has what you need to reverse a separation too, within the Course itself as well as this bonus book. After all, getting back together after a break up involves understanding what went wrong and how to fix the problems – obviously a key part of the Course.)

Relationship Recovery is currently $37 (including the two bonuses) and backed by a no-questions 100% money-back guarantee, making it a totally risk-free purchase. As it’s an ebook (.pdf document) you can download it right away to the privacy of your computer.

Rushing into a divorce is just as wrong as rushing into a marriage, and it is never too late to try to stop a divorce. You and your spouse have worked together over the years to face life’s challenges and can work together to save your marriage. And your doubts and unhappiness about divorce are a strong sign that you should try.

If you are the one who said the dreaded “D” word first

You will need to go to your spouse and explain that you were talking without thinking. Now that you’ve had time to think about it, you know that in reality it’s not what you want. You may face some anger and resentment, but this is natural. Allow your spouse time to cool off and think about your change of heart. Alternatively, your spouse may be immediately relieved that you don’t really want to divorce and enthusiastically embrace the idea of doing all you can to avoid it.

Nobody really wants a divorce until a lot of bad things have happened and there is no avoiding the fact that a marriage is over. However, practically every marriage can stand one big mistake. Well all is said and done, one mistake really only requires one sincere apology that the other can trust and believe in. It is the multiple mistakes and multiple apologies that add up to an ultimate decision that the marriage is doomed.

With this in mind, it’s important to distinguish between “mistakes” and “problems”. Mistakes are things that people choose to do, and the more they do them the more impossible they are to forgive. Problems, on the other hand, are often thrust on a marriage. For example, the stresses and strains of interference by in-laws and financial worries. So, while multiple mistakes often spell disaster, multiple problems may be far less likely to result in divorce that you think.

If your spouse was the first to mention divorce

There is still a good chance that you can stop the divorce and save your marriage instead. This is not to say that it will be easy but the hardest part will be the first part – getting your spouse on board.

Your strongest tool in this respect will be your sincerity. Expressing your “sincerity” does not mean displaying your desperation, neediness and fear. It means sincerity of the “calm, considered and collected” variety more likely to win a sympathetic hearing.

Secondly, you need to be bale to present them with solid reasons why you believe your marriage deserves a second chance. For help with this, see Should I Save My Marriage? – Reasons Not to Divorce which contains a number of statements – each one that applies is a good reason you should try.

Of course first you will need to persuade your spouse to give you their time and a willing ear. Again, this will require you being calm and making certain up-front promises about the nature of the talk.

Working together to stop a divorce

Trying to stop a divorce and save a marriage instead is of course easier with a spouse who is as anxious as you are to prevent your marriage derailing. It gives you more options in terms of help and support available to prevent a divorce.

For instance, you might want to consider using the services of a relationship therapist, or checking out books for saving a  marriage that you can work through together.

There are also ways that you can engage in some home-made marriage counseling. For example, relationship expert Michael Webb’s 1000 Questions for Couples is an excellent resource for rediscovering each other and gaining new insights too.

Working solo to stop a divorce

Even if you think there is no hope at all of stopping a divorce – your spouse is completely estranged and/or seems hell bent on ending your marriage – there is still hope.

The better “save my marriage” books, such as Amy Waterman’s Save my Marriage Today and Rachel Rider’s Relationship Recovery course, recognize this is a common problem. Step-by-step marriage-saving plans like these are designed to make a difference even when only one party is trying.

The bottom line

Many couples have been well along the path to divorce but managed to not only save their marriage but improve it. The shared effort and experience of surviving a close encounter with divorce brings a new confidence in the relationship, in how much you mean to each other and often, new insights that add a new dimension to a marriage. And in many of these cases, it was one person alone who made a decision to do what they could to stop the divorce. So, if you believe that there is any chance that your marriage can be saved, arm yourself with all the tools available and try.

The worst possible outcome is that your marriage will prove un-saveable. If so, then there is at least a silver lining that will sustain you through divorce – the knowledge that you gave your marriage your very best shot. Though never easy, divorce is definitely easier when it is not plagued by the nagging thought that perhaps it could have been saved. You will know for sure, that it couldn’t.

But for now… have every confidence in your ability to repair and renew your marriage because if the fundamentals of a good marriage are in place – if you can answer “yes’ to most of these statements – there is every chance that you can indeed stop a divorce.

An original article by Caroline Mackenzie, exclusive to this site and protected by copyright.